Gods and monsters rage inside my head like a turpentine drunk as an orphaned yellow moon drinks illuminations
to my medicated night-
You were right when you told me life is a paradox between saints and degenerates.
These visions came out of the blue no peyote or magic mushrooms, my mind split as if by lighting piercing this self I no longer knew.
My soul shattered in two crying gibberish into the new dawn with a fierce light burning away my false image as the whole world screamed.
Oh brief, exquisite, holy gone moment,
alive and dying-death and rebirth-a continual movement,
a never-ending circle-whole Cosmoses born and destroyed, multiple universes exploded before my eyes-supernovas,
whole constellations of new flowering frontiers,
and I, well I had disappeared into THAT,
and the heartbeat I heard was the heartbeat of the world.
Sweet revelation I was no longer separate and my body
had turned into a weight of holy water with my head exploding
into fragments of divine wyrdness and my soul became an uncaged bird flying high above the
firmament of my feverish mind, and as I stood there I knew I was forgiven-forgiven for every goddamn thing I ever did,
forgiven for daring to think this I even mattered,
this I had no more currency than a Wall Street crash
worthless I was free to roam, no longer was I chained
to this wheel of constant becoming, and became in an instant, my wounded angel’s grace.